Quote/Lyric of the Moment

"We never are what we intend or invent."

-Brand New "At the Bottom"

Friday, March 11, 2011

Taken With You (Reasons for Reason...)

Dear You,
    Simplicity is my tranquilizer; no reason, no meaning, no analyzations. Just taking everything as it is without any assumptions or raging thoughts. Isn’t it strange then to find enjoyment in subjects such as English? Isn’t it strange how we all analyze each other consistently trying to solve one another like some code of sorts? The motives, the intentions, the possibilities of one simple action, one simple thought, one typically insignificant word.
   We frusterate ourselves, throwing and formulating and building and keeping ourselves awake in these analyzations, these unnecessary  thoughts, prying for answers….and we blame the other person, damning them and their actions which seem so foreign to us. In reality, there may be no reason at all; it may be just the search or need for something that influences the reason we all form. It’s definitely you. And, all your thoughts.
   However, there’s a sort of enlightenment within the realm of observation and analyzation. In a way, it keeps us going, keeps us alert of possibilities. However biased the reasons some form can be, let us not forget that they are still possibilities. They can happen, and they can be. Someone once told me “to question the mind keeps us young.” Haha well it certaintly keeps us open to all possibilities, but it primarily ages us as we pound our heads against the table thinking and questioning. Our minds are like Google; one word equals over a hundred results. And, how can we know which ones are valid? Which ones are credible… Isn’t it amazing to see who comes up with what? 
   Sometimes I’ll sub-consciously watch someone doing something as simple as talking, reading, or just standing there looking at something that I cannot see as they are, no doubt, consumed by a million search results within their own head…and I’ll want to know why or how, or what it is they are consumed by. It’s not everything people do; only the natural, simple things that I notice. Why? Hmm I don’t really know. My guess would be that because it is so easy, the naturalness of it is so beautiful…just to see someone in their own world doing something completely irrelevant to what they are thinking. And, it’s quite obvious with most people that they’re distracted by their raging thoughts. The people who are immensely quiet are the difficult ones; they could be plotting, scheming, reflecting on their past, or just….not thinking at all. Maybe it’s that way with everyone, and maybe it’s only that way with certain people, I don’t know.
   One thing I do know is that it’s the simplicity I have trouble analyzing. Even though my first statement was that the simplicity of things calms me and relaxes my mind, it also sends my mind pushing through all theories and inquiries, thrusting and surging within and past, and everywhere everywhere everywhere….The difference is, though, that the thoughts caused by the simplicity don’t escalate or overflow as much as the complexity of other things.
   Contradictions. I am contradicting myself again and again, aren’t I? I had said that I have trouble analyzing the simplicity of things- because the possibilities range far and beyond regular assumptions- but they don’t cause as much frusteration as the analyzations of complexity. Although, I’ve obviously contradicted myself, I don’t take anything back because, funnily enough, my statements still feel accurate. They still feel all too familiar and right to me.
   Have I caused you much confusion? Although it was not my intention- actually, I don’t know what my intentions are in typing this, but I like it very much so- I will not apologize (who would I apologize to? This wasn’t meant for anyone particular) because even you- yes, that’s right, you too- confuse the hell out of me. Everything you do and say and think. You don’t even know, you’re not even certain about everything you think. And, an honest, but fairly long conversation could prove that- if you’re patient and open-minded. Many people will say “oh humans are the most complex, complicated creatures ever to be created.” I don’t really agree with that statement. Sure, some are complex, actually very few of them are. In general (very bold, I know), humans are so easy to figure out. So predictable and successful at meeting expectations , many without even trying or knowing that they’re doing it. They’re so transparent…so simple.
   Maybe that’s why I find them beautiful as well. Humans are scary, solicitous, similar. They can be cruel, ugly. They can be kind and suprisingly loving. They can be pawns, powerful, manipulative and mentally dominated or emotionally controlled. All of these natural potentials of humans are so universally instinctive, that because of the wide range of possibilities, they are simple. Simplicity is beautiful and very taking. Do you understand now? I am unwillingly but curiously taken with you and everything you do. you are probably taken by someone else, something else. They or it is taken with someone or something else….and so on does the net weave. 

Forever Endeavor,
Vex

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